Rollergirls!

This Rollergirls thing... man, I was hot on it once, wasn't I? Funny, looking back at it. Turned out to be a big mess in the end, and very frustrating. Later blogs, I trust, reflect that. Or maybe it's all in my mind. This was first posted Monday, August 21, 2006

When I tell people I'm producing the season DVD for the Alamo City Rollergirls, they always ask me the same question. Male or female, almost everyone wants to know: Are they hot?

Do people ask the guys in the tank at SeaWorld if the fish are real big? Anybody pull the dude with the jackhammer aside to find out if the street is hard? Of course the Rollergirls are hot! (If you want to impress, refer to them as "derby girls." A little inside dope for you.)

But here's the thing -- it's not just the hardbodies, the Amazons, the sleek speed demons who are hot. Ages out there range from 18 to 46 (I think that's the oldest). Body types go from Kate Moss to Lane Bryant and beyond. There are tattoos and piercings and there are moms and accountants. Satanic rockers and church-going choir girls. You see some of these women on the street, you might not think anything of it, or you might cross to the opposite sidewalk.

See them on the track, dressed to (almost literally) kill, and you'll be knocked out.

Part of it is the outfits, of course -- almost any woman's going to look good in fishnet hose and a corset, that's just natural law, part of God's plan. And part of it is the skates and pads and helmets, makes them taller and tougher and incredibly bad-ass, RoboCop in drag (which is an idea that'll make some Hollywood executive rich someday...).

Most of it, however, is attitude. These women are so confident. You watch them and can't help but want to be with them, if only in the hope that some of that might rub off. Women have known this for generations -- the bad boy is sexy not because he's bad, but because he's so sure of himself.

Last night was the best night of Roller Derby all season. The most violent, the fastest, and not a single fight, maybe for the first time. Not surprisingly, we got some great shots. Russ was there, his camera up on his monopod (not a euphemism) and swooping all over the place. Laurie was there, camped out by the benches, getting the sweep around the first turn.

And I was giddy with the excitement. I finally got the shot I've been waiting for since the first bout -- one of the girls skidded out of control and landed right in my lap! I was so cool, even I couldn't believe it (and I know how impossibly cool I am). I consciously did not extend a leg to protect myself (I was on the floor by the track), lest I injure the skater. I did bring my knee up slightly, to let my shin protect my groin, and I feel it a little, but not much. (My shin, not my groin.) I didn't waver in my shot, kept the camera right on (I think it was) Nita Spankin as she plunged toward the lens (but didn't hit it, thank goodness). If I were a photojournalist, this is where I'd be talking Pulitzer.

But that was just my best shot of the night, far from the only great one. There was so much hitting and bumping, I may have to use some of the extra to beef up the video of some of the less dynamic nights.

Next month, there are two rounds -- an All-Star game in Austin, against the best of the two Dallas leagues, the best of the Houston league, and the winners play the Austin champs. And then there's the Alamo City Rollergirls Championship itself, third Sunday, that promises to be a big one. There'll be a lot of action in that one.

If you've got a three-chip camera and want in on this, let me know. I'm always looking for more crew. And it's a great time.